For the recent C3 Conference Ed Young produced this “rap” video. Perhaps, this spoke scriptural truth to attendees in a way that we outsiders cannot understand. Either way, this odd duck wandered from that swamp and into the common waters. That being the case, it is open for ridicule. YAY!
I am reminded of that summer when my dad was a fan of Eminem and of the time when someone thought Carmen was a good idea.
Below you will find most of the lyrics which are not available anywhere else (yes, I took the time to listen and re-listen just to get this hilarity in print.) However, failing to be as street as Ed Young I’m not down with all the lingo which means I’m unclear on a few lines.
For your entertainment (or displeasure), U.B.U. lyrics with commentary:
I don’t know why you came to this conference but I (his attempt at urban gospel???) came to praise the Lord.
I’m preaching and you’re shouting. (????)
Bill Hybels studied revival from the Bible Acts 2 tells you what to do (I’m pretty sure I wrote this line in Group Evangelism class)
Joel was smiling Mullet reviling on TV again can I say amen Pentecostal with the gospel
A Calvinistic Baptistic legalistic call it what you want it’s pessimistic
It’s kinda hyper (referring back to Calvinism of course) trying to decipher John Piper (actually, he’s not difficult to interpret but then I didn’t make this video)
Andy Stanley got the family (major crime) Ward Cleaver where’s the Beaver (whaaaa??? Jerry Mathers does radio now)
Louie Giglio what’s the dillyo (dillyo? Really-o? So 1999) with the college kids and their polo (What is puzzling about a golf shirt?)
Pastor tithing and surviving thriving and blogging and bragging and twittering (Matthew Paul Turner, mos def though he’s not a pastor)
And littering (Agreed, littering is bad but who is he talking about?)
I’m getting between you and your make-up (you leave the TBN lady outta this) I’m getting up in your grill
Bishop Jakes bringing the heat like Lebron why compete? (Why he name drops a basketball player, I don’t know. Why does he compare Jakes to Lebron James? Is it because they are both black?? Very odd.)
Hillsong worship intergalactic (I thought that was a Beastie Boys song) got Brian Houston saying “Fantastic”
Want Satellites like Craig Groeschel,book deals like Rob Bell? (YES)
Rick Warren Saddleback rockin’ Tommy Bahama and Dockers slacks (easy target)
Justin Franklin of the dawn (???) telling students “Keep your underwear on” (my favorite part)
U.B.U. can’t hear ya what now?
I’m not David, Tino, Sam or Craig,Edwin, or Leon, Allen Stupid? (???)
Come a little closer and you’ll see I’m not a country boy like white JC (wait, Jesus was white?)
Somebody call somebody
Somebody call somebody (is THIS an AT&T commercial?)
I’m an American aquarium drinker… (OK he didn’t say that but I don’t know what he said)
Shirt looking swell got it on sale fighting hell can’t you tell (I can tell you’re shirt was on sale, head band too right?)
Whole ‘nother level,Whole new devil (rockin’ the horns)
I’m a pastor vision caster a question master also a rapper (no, you’re not)
A delegater not a hater focused on the job not the mob (oh, we’re comin’ for ya)
Listen to complaining very draining (Can you hear our complaints?)
Church relaxin’ givin’ exlax (TMI)
Front door back door more and more and more (I don’t like the sound of this.)
Staff meetin’ whatcha deletin’ (someone’s cookin’ the books? Maybe?)
Show me the numbers churches competin’
Packed to the ceiling who ya reachin’?
Who ya reachin’?
U.B.U. it’s what God says (I thought he said be like Jesus)
I’m not David, Tino, Sam or Craig,Edwin, or Leon, Allen Stupid? (hahahaha)
Come a little closer and you’ll see I’m not a country boy like white JC
This year’s conference is about the iguana (Sign Me Up!)
So hot feels like Tijuana (in his best Hispanic voice…this part reminded me of The Pest)
It’s time for you to be you
“Hey man you be you”
Thank you Joel
“Touch your neighbor (it IS for AT&T) say ‘it’s time for …you be you…yyyyyyou be you…’” ( Bishop =cookie monster?)
Thank you Bishop
“Church it’s time for you to be” (In his best CRIKEY voice)
Thank you Brian
Slap your neighbor say U.B.U. (shaking hands is a thing of the past, let’s fight.)
Cause if you ain’t you who’s gonna be you?
If you ain’t you there’s gonna be a whole in history (like Lennon’s lost weekend?)
A gap in God’s creative order (and you, Mr. Young, are going to stand in that gap?)
God’s gonna say why aren’t you more like YOU (Imagine that!)
I wish I had somebody…(everybody needs somebody sometime )